My young sister was called “the old orphan” by one of her closest friends’ when in a fight. She called me later that day and told me this story and I literally burst out in laughter.I never seize to see the humour in all things. I will laugh if it is funny. The friend who called her that, had just lost her mother and we lost our mother over 13 years ago, so I guess it made sense to be called “an old orphan”.
I cry sometimes because I do miss her and in some moments I wish I could talk to her and also I wish i had someone in life to love me un conditionally. I also lost my father and all my grandparents and I don’t say this for sympathy it’s just what it is. I know her spirit still lives but you know sometimes I really wish I could see her, the grieving never ends.
I have come to realize that it brought me a lot of anxiety, losing people in my life. That is in all my relationships of friendships and this also made me take on a lot of people’s bullshit and mistreatment. But of course, now that I am aware that has been a problem solved.
I also do search for deeper things in life. Iam just not your average person.
I seek to live a supernatural life, and I have decided to recondition myself and live a conscious life. I feel energy because IAM spirit so I am energy, we all are, it’s all about being aware of that.
My prayer is that the lord keeps awakening me daily to my True self. I pray that I live my truth. We are all special and are born to accomplish something but most people never really live there true purpose and I pray to God that I live mine!
Not having parents definitely takes me away to conforming to family limitations because so many people just live there lives for there families that is parents, children and so on and never get the time to discover themselves. Also some live for their spouses or limit themselves to a certain group of people. Watch out when someone refers to you as my this or my that, that is a true limitation. They be expecting a certain treatment from you to please there ego.
Set yourself free and wander away every once in a while, and go talk to a stranger, it’s okay to go and have a drink by yourself at the bar or sit at the counter. Go and have a meal by yourself in the centre of the restaurant. Go on vacation alone. Fly away and just be, without asking for any company, for you are never alone. God is always with you. Be content with who you are, love your self and get comfortable with hanging with yourself.
You are not your friends, not your parents, not your children, not your tribe or race. Do you know who you are without all those things? Do you take time to feel that?
The word orphan just doesn’t reasonate. I was brought to this as I went to renew my passport in 2021 and there was an option where I had to put orphan because I lost both my parents. It caught me un aware, I released rage that was transferred to the person who served me and later an outburst of tears in my lone time. It makes one feel like they are a lesser member of society. It is just rude. Everyone one at some point in life loses their parents if not a parent loses a child which is rarer than the former. Let’s advocate it taken out of the dictionary. Besides we are spirits so we never die. We are immortal.